I am ethnic Indian and possibly 100% Indian blood, though I should get my gene test one day. But does it even matter? It really doesn’t matter to me; to me, identity is a trap; we all are trying to find our identity or find ways to live & accept the identity that we are born with. It does nothing; somewhat, it limits; yes, it allows us to connect with people of our tribe who have similar labels of that identity; to me, that is definitely a trap of not extending our circles.
I have been dabbling with this personally for a while now, but it is getting aggravated now more than ever. I am comfortable with who I am and am thankful for the identity I was born with, but now I want to shed it off. It does no service to me.
My identity means I like certain food (Indian), know Indian culture & tradition, celebrate Indian festivals (like Diwali, Holi, etc.), follow Hinduism, like wearing Indian ethnic wear (I really don’t), etc. I don’t even know what that means and why it matters that I was born in Lucknow and grew up in a small township - Mankapur (which can also be pronounced Mankapore) cut off from the major cities but led a very comfortable & safe childhood in government quarters in the middle of nowhere.
Every last second, minute, and hour that has passed away is a life that I lived already, and I appreciate that, but that life is over, and in every present second, I want to create a new life, a life that is taking me towards my final goal of Nirvana.
As I start shedding off my identities to take my journey of being “Nobody.” I started realizing I appreciate and cherish diversity so much. I love interacting with people of different cultures, ethnicities, and genders more than I do; I find more comfort and home in them.
For many, diversity in terms of ethnicity is uncomfortable, but in my case, lack of diversity makes me super uncomfortable. When I am around people of similar identity as mine, I feel life seems to be very limiting, and I generally want to run away from those scenarios. Also, living with identities creates attachment and ego, inhibiting our spiritual journey.
My past is dead, my present is live, and in the future, I will be dead and will go back to nothingness, so in reality, my identity is meaningless, as I am just part of the cosmos like everyone else.
Love & Light,
“Nobody”